Octomania

Rating Everyone Genre puzzle Publisher Conspiracy Entertainment External Links Conspiracy Games Website

Takoyaki, an amazing Japanese dish consisting of small, round, fried or baked octopus dumplings. In short, all around winner. Octomania, a really, really poor version of Puzzle Fighter, with worse controls, and normally served with a side of buyer’s remorse and frustration. In the guestimated words of Mama herself, “Ew, not mine.” Note : Does not go well with alcohol. Yes, even with the appealing street price of $19.99 American, this boring, albeit pretty and happy, title will defiantly cling for a dust covered life on the store shelf.

The actual plot of Octomania (yes, it has one) is that amateur sorceress Kari attempts to conjure her favorite treat, Takoyaki, and ends up, as all bubbly sorceress characters do, causing kingdom-wide panic when she causes thousands and thousands of little octopi to come raining down from the sky. She then undertakes a quest to rid the land of the massing cephalopods by fighting her way through some of the cutest and at the same time, most annoying characters ever imagineered. The actual game structure is very similar to each and every ‘things fall down from the ceiling, lets move them around’ type game from Tetris to Magic Drop. In this particular case our split-screening heroine must wrangle up octopi of similar color into randomly spawning nets, and from there attempt to generally rearrange the entire screen before succumbing to a slow and brightly colored death. Blah blah blah, stack more wins to put pressure on the opponent, you know the drill.

Perhaps one of the most redeemable qualities of game is its upbeat music and adorable graphics, mainly the games intro film. The opening itself made me smirk at the game in disbelief. The main character holding a serving dish full of anthropomorphic Takoyaki, all made to look like babies; selectable characters like the Kappa Prince, and the suckling Baby Dragon, and everyone’s ‘Favorite’ the afro-wearing, hip-hop rapping, stocky Living Tree-thingy. But. silly plot and terribly annoying characters aside, it is the basic lack of speed and accuracy provided by the Wiimote that sinks this already leaky ship.

In a game with an already lightning fast pace, failure to keep ones arm straight for the duration of the match, after match, after match, will inevitably cost you a victory. Since every tap of the button effects not just two, but four targeted squares, one little slip can and will ruin the whole match. The competition is only bearable during Wii-wireless play against mystery opponents around the country, but lag and latency issues are just as prevalent as they are in Super Smash Bros Brawl. One on one against friends and family can prove entertaining, especially if either of you are particularly good. All in all, it’d make a nice Saturday morning cartoon, but as an up to date puzzle game, back to the kitchen with you Octomania.