Jack's Mannequin - Everything in Transit

Genre rock Publisher Maverick Records External Links Official Website Maverick Records

Sometimes I resent Jawbreaker. I mean, I know it's not their fault, but as I get older (I mean "age gracefully"), I become exponentially more enraged by the proliferation of suburban Hot Topic-shopping screamo bands whose names would be stupid enough as mere sentence fragments. Like Matchbook Romance, The Academy Is...(what? trying to score instant cred by obliquely referencing Mission of Burma?) and Something Corporate. Aside from being THE WORST BAND NAME EVER, Something Corporate brings us to this review, for it is the restlessness of their singer/pianist Andrew MacMahon that led to Jack's Mannequin, MacMahon's side project.

However, if MacMahon thinks he's gonna slide by on some emo technicality without mention of his obvious ripoff of beloved OG piano emo dudes Piebald, he's sadly mistaken. Also, I thought that the point of the side project was to do stuff that you couldn't do in your regular band. I'm almost sure that MacMahon could find a place in Something Corporate for songs about girls who won't sleep with him, way-too-clean-sounding major-label production, and anthemic choruses. Oh, and piano. However, there's way more piano than the average Something Corporate song contains, which may explain Jack's Mannequin right there. Lyrically in MacMahon's world, girls are off limits because they have good taste in music, like "Miss Delaney". Los Angeles really sucks, honestly ("Holiday from Real"). SAT words make the obligatory appearance-see the "symphony of sound" in "Mixed Tape." Speaking of which, there wouldn't even BE emo without the mix tape! Am I supposed to believe MacMahon couldn't shoehorn that onto his real band's playlist?

What we have here is a vanity project, not a side project. If MacMahon wants more of the soundtrack profits from The OC, then he needs to come clean already. Everything in Transit is dangerously disingenous careerist emo, which is even worse than the real thing.